Control Is An Illusion

Today’s episode “Control Is An Illusion” is on iTunes/Apple Podcasts, SpotifyOvercast, Libsyn, Pocket CastStitcher, iHeartRadio, or anywhere you listen to podcasts.

Hello 2020! SO much to…uh…unpack in today’s episode! Yes. Yes, we just said “unpack.” But it’s kind of true. We are bringing 2020 in like spiritual giants today! None of this namby pamby “I want to lose 10 pounds” or “I’m going to quit yelling at people in traffic!” resolution nonsense to start off the new year and new decade. (For the record, Kris already tried the second one and it’s just NOT happening folks. As for the first…we’re both working on it.) Nope. We get straight into beastmode as we go over two very deep topics: Letting Go and Signs of Maturity.

Tee hee. Don’t mind us. We’re just over here on top of the mountain, sitting cross-legged and sh*t talking to butterflies with our minds. Just kidding. We’re probably sitting at our desks drinking coffee cussing someone out under our breath and immediately feeling guilty for it. Because not mature, for sure.

Moving on.

Today’s episode is inspired by an amazing 12-step program called Al-Anon. If you aren’t aware of what Al-Anon is, it’s an offshoot from the 12-step program Alcoholics Anonymous. It was co-founded by Lois Wilson, wife of Bill Wilson who co-founded AA. As the wife of an alcoholic, Lois needed her own support group, and thus was formed Al-Anon…a group where family and friends affected by loved one’s drinking (or drugging, or any addictive self-destructive behavior, frankly) can find fellowship, guidance, serenity, and sanity.

Two readings we reference today are “Letting Go” (just google “letting go checklist Al-Anon” and you’ll see images pop up…mostly in Pinterest), and “A Checklist for Evaluating Our Maturity” (same, except, here’s a link to a blog which has it written out). There are some real gems in helping us realize just how much the idea of control is an illusion, actually, and that true serenity comes from “going with the flow.” As for that maturity thing…tsk…sigh…ugh…well, as much as Kris thinks she’s got a long way to go, it’s safe to say we’re both actually doing ok in the adulting department. Some would argue otherwise. Those some can kiss our butts. NYAHpffffffffffffffttt!

They’re GOALS….we never said we accomplished them all. TSK.

Now before we get into the fact checking and the links to topics we mentioned in the episode today, it’s very important for us to take a moment to get a bit serious and encourage anyone who has a friend or family member in the throes of alcoholism and/or addiction of any kind to contact Al-Anon as a starting point to help YOU get YOUR life back into the land of the living. It’s a scary thing, watching friends or family suffer from addiction, but on the sideline you don’t realize you, too, are suffering from the effects of the disease. If you need help to cope, you can start here. Give it a go…there is hope.

Alright. Now let’s get down to correcting ourselves. Six minutes into the episode and there’s already SO MUCH to fix. Sigh.

  • Is it realllllllly a new decade? If you’re like Kris’ dad, Kym’s former co-worker, and this article, you’ll be on the “NOPE WE AIN’T” side. If you’re like us, you DGAF. BUHbye moving on, there’s more important things to worry about, like Australia (pray for more rain. Right now. If you’re reading right now, stop and just read this out loud: “Dear God please rain water down on Australia”. Don’t care if you don’t believe in God. You can be an atheist. Just do it this one time…don’t even need to say the “G” word, just say, “HEY YOU UP THERE RAIN ON AUSTRALIA.” Thanks. And thanks skydaddy!)
  • Ok. Geography lesson. The mountains we refer to as Saddleback Mountains are actually the Santa Ana Mountains; the mountains we refer to as “north of us where Mt. Baldy and Big Bear are”….well, Mt. Baldy (also known as Mt. San Antonio) is in the San Gabriel Mountains which were spectacularly covered (and still are) in snow last week. Big Bear, however, is in the San Bernardino Mountains. We’ve lived here all our lives and yet we still can only dopity-dope over the purty snow on the hills off yonder without knowing what the heck we’re actually looking at. Whatever. Now we ALL know. Class dismissed.
  • Mr. Geography: Excuse me, Kris, please hang back a mo. Kris: But Mr. Geography, the rest of the class is leav… Mr. Geography: Mt. Whitney is in Sequoia National Park which is nowhere near where you live. No. Where. Near. Hundreds of miles away. Still in California, yes. But you can’t see it. Because…Far. Away. Not. Near. You. Kris dismissed.
  • CFL…ohKriskriskriskris. You talk so much. So fast. You make so many mistakes. #eyeroll. It’s CSF. Cerebrospinal Fluid. Sniff.
  • Morf = Mike Morford, whom we interviewed last season, is producer of Scene of the Crime podcast, cohost on Criminology and Three Men and a Mystery podcasts, and host of The Murder in My Family podcast. Thank you Morf for your shoutout on Twitter. We’re still gobsmacked you listen to our show.
  • Naptime Nancy: Another kickass podcaster whose episodes can be and should be listened to immediately. Go here to do so.
  • Morning news items. Time to change the lock screen settings on the ol’ iPad to something more relaxing. Not like this creepy crap: We killed an Iraqi General and have maybe started WWIII; why you shouldn’t ever write “20” for the year 2020 on checks and documents (always write 2020); and those nutty mysterious drones over Colorado.
  • Anjelah Johnson. Kym was mostly right. It’s Anjelah NICOLE Johnson. OHMYGAWD if you don’t know the nail salon sketch, you need to edumacate yourself now.
Photo by Evie Shaffer on Pexels.com

And with that, we’ll say, “welcome 2020, you’re doing your best to test us mere mortals first week in, but guess what. You’re not in control. We choose zen.” And coffee. We always choose coffee. Clink!

Thank you for joining us. Check out The Mugly Truth Podcast’s episode “Control Is An Illusion” on  iTunes/Apple Podcasts, SpotifyOvercast, Libsyn, Pocket CastStitcher, iHeartRadio, or anywhere you listen to podcasts. Then all you need to do is 1) subscribe 2) download and 3) listen! AND!!! 4) If you enjoy what you hear, please leave a rating and a review (pretty please?). The more subscribers and reviews we get, the more opportunities we get to grow this podcast and bring you richer content.

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© The Mugly Truth 2020 and © The Mugly Truth Podcast 2020. All rights reserved.
Intro and outro music, “Clever as a Fox”  by Espresso Music through premiumbeats.com.

Featured Photo of Illusion Face in Mirror by Ismael Sanchez on Pexels.com


Episode 06: Only Brats

Yep. Kris and Kym…are only brats. There are plenty of pros and cons with Only Child Syndrome. We had everything we needed, most of what we wanted. We never had to fight for the last cupcake, always got to ride shotgun (unless both parents were in the car) and we were the center of the Universe (we like to believe. And maybe still do…*sideeye*). And yet there were a lot of lonely days, and when things went south at home (because, you know, even in the very healthiest and happiest of households that happens) there was no one to turn to, to share the fear or the sadness with. There wasn’t a brother to feel safe with, there wasn’t a sister to whisper and giggle with. There was just…ourselves. And not all experiences for only children are like this, in fact, our experiences are quite different from each other although we both expressed that similar overall feeling of loneliness.  A lot depends on the parents and Kym is proof one parent can more than compensate for one not so great BioPU (Biological Parental Unit…pronounced bio-poo for good reason). When both parents are trying to get their lives together and rebuild and work and cope…sometimes the child gets a bit lost in the mix (Kris). And while we’re not going to outright say, “hey, that’s ok really, we ended up fine,” because it’s really NOT totally ok…there is an element of peace in that statement. Because we both did. And here we are, one raising two girls, one having raised a daughter…and all the offspring are doing a-ok. Because even though we’re only children, we really did learn how to share (I always say the ultimate and supreme sacrifice of love is letting the one you love have that last bite of cake) and we took the things we didn’t want to carry into our motherhood and made a real effort to do things differently for our children. Even better, we took the things we DID love and learn from our parents to be pretty decent parents ourselves. We think. We have expressly forbidden said offspring to indicate otherwise in any fashion verbal, body language, Snapchat, texting, YouTube rants, tweeting videos, IG IMs, etc., etc., etc., et al, legal verbiage infinity.

Just kidding. Titter teehee laugh laugh.

A bit selfish? Check.

Confident with being alone? Check check.

Center of the Universe? CHECK CHECK CHE….

Just kidding. AHHGAIN.


Well-adjusted and loving life? Definitely maybe could be possible Check.

Working on the above? For sure CHECK.

There’s lots of good in being an only child, and a lot of wishful thinking…

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© The Mugly Truth 2018 and © The Mugly Truth Podcast 2018. All rights reserved.
Intro and outro music, “Clever as a Fox”  by Espresso Music through premiumbeats.com