Florida

The Coronials Are Coming!

March 24, 2020April 6, 2020 themuglytruth

Hey here we are…over here. No. Not over there. BACK HERE. **Waving** Oh…wait… (pulls mask down…BOOP!) HERE WE ARE! Hi! WHOA…Stay back! BACK! No hugs. Are you a covidiot? We love you, but from a distance mate. We’ll stay over here, you stay over there, and once we’re done with our essential errands (you got any tp? no? ok…) we’re going back home. Where everyone who isn’t saving people, providing food, gas, or medicinal (and apparently construction) services belong. (Someone coughs in the distance) EVERYBODY DOWN!!!!!! Sorry. Sorry. Everyone ok? Sorry ’bout that. We’re just a little skittish. This is our first time out in…um…what day is it? Sigh.

Isn’t that how it feels? Welcome to what we thought was just some distant, dystopian future in a sci-fi novel. In less than a week the world flipped upside down and now many people are self-sheltering to “flatten the curve”…many have lost jobs and the V Who Must Not Be Named statistics seem to have grown exponentially overnight. Oh, and you know what else is on the horizon with all this staying at home stuff? A baby boom! Yeah, come December, we’re gonna see the first results of some spectacular self-sheltering, because last we looked condoms were NOT flying off the shelves like Clorox wipes. We officially vote AYE for this next generation to be called Coronials. And come 2033 these Coronials will be Quaranteens, wreaking havoc on their poor parents like the virus they’re named after. Ok. Maybe not THAT bad. But honestly anyone who thinks that’s harsh hasn’t lived with a teenager.

Then there’s the naysayers, the hoaxers, conspiracy theorists, and the just plain stupidiotic who go around licking toilet seats on airplanes (really, it happened, we saw the video and NO WE’RE NOT LINKING TO THAT CRAP). Yep, the world is getting a ginormous 20-something middle finger to the “biggest government overreaction in the history of everything.” Let’s face it, some of our older generation isn’t being that helpful either. What is it with you people?!? If you’re not blaming each other for the world’s problems, you’re legit behaving JUST LIKE EACH OTHER! “PSHT, there’s no virus!” “PSHT it’s a government agenda!” “PSHT! It’s just a cold!” “PSHT! I’m not gonna catch it and if I do who cares!” “PSHT can’t make me stay home I have APPOINTMENTS.” Look. Us GenXers just want you all to f**cking go home and chill out. IT’S! NOT! THAT! HARD! But seriously, if we have to rely on the Kardashians and other social influencers to be the voice of sanity, we’re in trouble. And let’s not forget Florida. Now, we understand all those morons traveled to you, Florida, for spring break from all us other schmucky states, but you let them in. Go to your room – like the rest of us – and think about what you’ve done.

Really, we’re wondering what this world is coming to. Who knew that our mental and physical health check-ins would include saying things like, “My anxiety level increases when I see the grocery store doesn’t have toilet paper or hand sanitizer…again.”

Many are adjusting to working from home for the first time ever, many businesses are shuttering temporarily (or permanently), the U.S. government can’t get their collective brain cells in one spot long enough to pass a stimulus package to save their or our lives, and many (like Kris) are finding the transition of saving the world by sitting on the couch binge-watching Netflix and Amazon Prime fairly normal behavior.

And while we wait for the paper goods manufacturers to gather up the next big wave of shipments, we’re praying that the hoarders finally have enough paper goods and water to get through the next two decades apparently, so the rest of us can catch a freaking break.

But enough of that. We all know how ridiculous some people have become in this unprecedented time. Let’s focus on the good. China has reported it’s first no-new-virus days since the first outbreak occurred. We’re hearing reports that our lovely planet is healing because millions of us ARE stay inside, not traveling, and not driving around like the unwoke nutjobs that we’ve been. Apparently the canals in Venice are CLEAR for the first time in about 60 years. People are dropping the political vitriol (sort of) and playing fun games on Facebook – it’s kind of like 2009 again – and families are actually spending more time together. Some more successfully than others (we’re just saying that’s a statistically probable statement.) But mostly we see people combating the crazy and frightening with fun and humor. While eating tons of pasta.

So today we brought a little levity to the Covid-catch-up. And we do so whilst being responsible Americans, socially distancing even from each other. Kym called in and Kris recorded it with the mic Kym would have used. Not a perfect set up by any means, we know, so the sound quality will be, ah…interesting. Just pretend Kris is some news lady interviewing some famous person calling in to the show. Ok? Ok. We also talk about some upcoming International Days you can celebrate whilst vacationing in the South of Living Room, or the Coast of Kitchen, or that sleepy little town of Bedroom.

For links about the days we talk about check out the United Nations website here and kalender-365 here. And apparently there are even more days we didn’t know about here.

For the video that simulates the effects of how viruses spread, please go to this Washington Post article with the four phases of quarantining – free-for-all, quarantining sick only, moderate social distancing and extensive social-distancing (self-sheltering) – scroll down to about the middle of the article to see the simulators.

But the true hero of the episode is Kym’s Stay Home Playlist. HIT IT LIL KYM:

Kick Out the Epic Motherf**ker by Dada Life
I Won’t Back Down by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
The Climb by Miley Cyrus
Time Bomb by Rancid
Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus
Work From Home by Fifth Harmony feat. Ty Dolla $ign
Don’t Stand So Close to Me by The Police
It’s the End of the World as We Know It by R.E.M.
The Champion by Ludacris
Glorious by Skylar Grey
Time of Our Lives by Pitbull and Ne-Yo
Til I Collapse by Eminem feat. Nate Dogg
Fighter by Christina Aguilera
Warriors by Imagine Dragons
Girl on Fire by Alicia Keyes
Let’s Go Crazy by Prince and the Revolution
Down With the Sickness by Disturbed
Rise by Katy Perry
I Don’t Wanna Be an A**hole Anymore by The Menzingers
Highway to Hell by AC/DC
Welcome to the Jungle by Guns ‘n’ Roses
Ghost Town by The Specials
The Gambler by Kenny Rogers
Only Human by The Jonas Brothers

And Kris added:

Don’t Fear the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult
Dead Man’s Party by Oingo Boingo

Because apparently she is a morbid motherf….

So that’s it! We’ll be back next week with an all new show, because we are dedicated to bringing you our opinions and quirky sense of humor to try to help entertain you even if it’s for just a moment.

Oh, and we’re sorry (kind of, but not, but kind of?) for the C word (the OTHER C word…) but – in our defense – we were just quoting Better Things. THEY SAID IT FIRST!!!! IT’S THEIR FAULT. But in all honesty, haven’t we all had this fight to some degree or another with our mom/daughter? No? Just us? Okaaaaaay. (To be clear we have not ever called our kids the C word but not gonna say we haven’t entertained the thought once or twice. Teenagers/20-somethings, amirite?)

OK BYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEE.

Check out The Mugly Truth Podcast’s episode “The Coronials Are Coming!” on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Overcast, Libsyn, Pocket Cast, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, or anywhere you listen to podcasts. Then all you need to do is 1) subscribe 2) download and 3) listen! AND!!! 4) If you enjoy what you hear, please leave a rating and a review (pretty please?). The more subscribers and reviews we get, the more opportunities we get to grow this podcast and bring you richer content.

And don’t forget to follow us here at themuglytruth.com (click that blue WordPress Follow button on the right side of your screen) so you get notifications every time we post an episode blog! You can also follow The Mugly Truth on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook.

© The Mugly Truth 2020 and © The Mugly Truth Podcast 2020. All rights reserved.
Intro and outro music, “Clever as a Fox” by Espresso Music through premiumbeats.com.
Featured photo of Masked Rider by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

Uncategorized

The Good, the Strange, and the Unusual

August 13, 2019August 12, 2019 themuglytruth

You know there are quite a few times where we drop an episode on the heels of “A Week From Hell” and this is one of them. It was just THAT kind of week last week. But THIS episode isn’t a bitchfest, like we’ve done in the past. Nope. We dragged our tired, sorry, barely-functioning selves into this episode with GOOD NEWS and WEIRD STORIES and you know what? By the end of the recording we were laughing, uplifted and felt like a bit of weight had been removed from our shoulders. We hope it does the same for you. So if you’re ready for good, strange, and unusual stories (unusual = a nice way for us to say WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, fyi), go on over to wherever you listen to us jabber, and settle in for some spirit raising. Not the Halloween ghosty kind…but you know that is right around the corner, WAHOOO!

First of all, let’s get one thing clear. Even though Kris swears the WTF week was to be blamed on mercury retrograde, she’d be wrong. It ended on August 1, but it’s possible there’s some residual cosmic two-by-four whacking still hanging in the ether. Also, in regards to Kris working as a candy-striper and Kym having her baby while Kris worked in admitting: Kris was a candy-striper at the hospital in high-school, but a few years later went back to work in the Admitting department which is when Kym rolled in ready to have that kid! Either way, Kris was not and never will be qualified to tell anyone how dilated their cervix is.

Moving on. Coff coff.

For the Good News stories, please feel free to visit our favorite warm-fuzzy website, GoodNewsNetwork.org for photos and details of the articles we talk about, but also for so much more that’s good for your heart and soul:

For the Australian study about trees making communities a better place, click here.
For the adulting list, click here.
For the Hyundai solar Sonata Hybrid article, click here.
For the coral reefs revival in Hawaii article, click here. Also, as Kris so, ah, eloquently stated…or tried to…coral reefs are NOT plants, they ARE animals, and this NOAA article says so much better than Kris ever could because they’re scientists and smartypants and stuff.
For the heartwarming dog stories, read about Steve Grieg’s senior dog rescue family here, (and his Instagram account with pics with his dogs, pig, rabbit AND chicken…yes he is amazing ladies and gentlemen…is here); for the story about six-legged puppy Roo, click here.
To read about the anxious elderly woman and her gallant hero on the plane, click here.
For the other stories we discuss, go ahead and check out goodnewsnetwork.org.

BUT! Before we head into our Strange and Unusual Stories, we’d be remiss if we didn’t take a small singing break. Here’s a clip of Billy Crystal in City Slickers and his rendition of Rawhide:

You’re welcome.

And now on to the Strange and the Unusual:

For the Colorado stories: the big city cattle herding with the longhorn who took a break from the festivities is here ; the creepy crawly ew ew ew tarantulas on the hunt for mates is here. (SHIVERTWITCHshivershiver. Shiver.)
For the real Snow White’s gravestone story, click here.
For the Farmer Boys Bacon Intern Job, click here. Hurry! You only have until 20 August 2019 to apply!
For the “octopiss” biting woman’s face story, read here. And if you have to read the bat-eating spider story which is in TEXAS of these here United States and NOT Australia which is sooooo very, very much farther away from us than Texas which is now waaaay too close to California, click here but why would you. (Dear future Kris, please do not move to Texas either.)
For the 5-year old Florida boy who had to have pizza STAT and the police who brought it to him, read here.
For the idiot prince of toxic masculinity who called in a bomb threat on a Lufthansa flight in order to get a date with a flight attendant, forget it. We’re not promoting that jerk. FOR. SHAME. And TSK also.
For all other stories, go ahead and Google that stuff, we have things to do, people.

As for that Shoe Tart video Kris posted on Facebook 9 years and a closet full of stilettos ago, here you go (sorry about the audio quality):

Check out our “The Good, the Strange, and the Unusual” episode on iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Overcast, Libsyn, Pocket Cast, Stitcher or anywhere you listen to podcasts. Then all you need to do is 1) subscribe 2) download and 3) listen! AND!!! 4) If you enjoy what you hear, please leave a rating and a review (pretty please?). The more subscribers and reviews we get, the more opportunities we get to grow this podcast and bring you richer content.

© The Mugly Truth 2019 and © The Mugly Truth Podcast 2019. All rights reserved.
Intro and outro music, “Clever as a Fox” by Espresso Music through premiumbeats.com.
Feature Newspaper and Coffee photo by Markus Spiske temporausch.com on Pexels.com
City Slickers clip courtesy YouTube, Castle Rock Entertainment, Distributed by Columbia Pictures and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures.
Shoe Tart video courtesy of Kristen Core © 2019 All rights reserved.

Episodes

Toe News Is Good News

June 18, 2019June 16, 2019 themuglytruth

Today we are calm, all is quiet, Kris tries Death Wish coffee and survives. All seems back to normal. We even bring back some spider stories. It’s a literal #TBT (Throwback, uh, Tuesday) episode as we share interesting stories we found from the internet. We have a few good ones, but in a flourish of dramatic mic-dropping, Kym lays a doozy of a story on Kris, like she does so often. We warn you, there’s a number of screams (because spiders, and…you know, Kym’s story) and maybe you shouldn’t eat before listening. We throw in some heart-warming tales to keep the episode afloat, but don’t forget…you’ve been given a head’s up. Or maybe we should say, toe’s up? Go listen now and while you’re doing that, check out the links and photos below for a truly well-rounded experience.

Zombie Snakes

Caution, if you have Ophidiophobia (fear of snakes), you’ve probably already thrown your computer out the window because of the photo below. But if you’re still peeking (perhaps a bit shaky if you’re anything like us?), rest assured that the purty little fellow is (fairly) harmless, but quite tricksy. Kris talks about the Eastern Hognose snakes who are making news lately for their defensive trick of playing dead when threatened, and then striking if something (or someone) gets too close. May we introduce to you the dramatic Eastern Hognose, otherwise knowns as ZOMBIE SNAKE (insert dramatic scary music):

This beauty right here is the North Carolina version of the Zombie Snake, or Hognose Snake (*Heterodon platirhinos*) in its dark phase. Photograph taken by Patrick Coin, https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.5/deed.en

For more information on these naughty slitherers, check out this CNN report.

Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure

Beyond this lighthouse is the Islands of Adventure amusement theme park at Universal Orlando in Orlando, *Florida*, where the new and vurrrrry popular Harry Potter roller coaster just opened up. Photo by NBCUniversal. **Permission (Reusing this file**) Released under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License and the Creative Commons Attribution ShareAlike License.

Be still Kris’ heart. The latest, and VERY expensive ($300 million to be exact) rollercoaster addition to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Orlando, Florida (boohoo) is open and it seems everyone in the world of muggles and wizards is running, flying, apparating, or port-keying to be there. The lines are…wait for it…TEN HOURS long. Kris is a fan, but even if she lived in Orlando she’d be steering clear of THAT crowd (she’s 10 minutes from Disneyland and steering clear of The Galaxy’s Edge til the crowds simmer down). For a fun video about the ride, watch this NBC news report and for more details check this out. Ah, someday, Kris’ll be flying through the humid, thick Orlando air on a magical motorbike. Someday.

Good Humans

Man giving his sandals to a young girl in need.

This is the viral image Kris spoke of in relation to the Good News Network story about Officer Brian Zagorski of Niles Police Department in Illinois. For more information about Officer Zagorski, please go here. He deserves a lot of recognition for taking time out to get to know a homeless man he saw having some trouble, and then literally giving him the shoes off his feet. As for the photo above, we don’t know the full story, or who took the photo. If you know the details and more importantly the photographer, please let us know as we would like to give proper credit.

But Wait, There’s More

The NASA “get paid to lie in bed” story can be found here and here. We talked about the $18,500 offer, so thought we’d post both stories to let you decided if it’s still enough to make you go to Germany and literally lie in a bed for 2 solid months.
For the Chobani donation to school lunch programs, go here. And then go buy some Chobani to celebrate (they just came out with a “less sugar” version of their flips yogurts!)
Ella Casano is the extraordinary 12 year old girl who came up with the idea of cover IV bags for pediatric patients can be found here. Ella has to have regular transfusions so she decided to make the experience better for her and countless other kids who suffer the pain of the procedure.
Speaking of extraordinary kids, here’s the story of lovely 6 year old Eva Chapman who collected over 1,000 jars of peanut butter and jelly to help feed her classmates she knew might go hungry over the summer without the school meal program to feed them. We love Eva. We’re not crying though. NO WE ARE NOT. NOT NOT NOT. *sniff

And Now: THE STORY OF THE SOURTOE COCKTAIL (((ackkk)))

Erp. This is where things get gross. Kym saved the weirdest story for the end. Have you heard of the Sourtoe Cocktail Club based out of the Sourdough Saloon nestled in Dawson City’s Downtown Hotel in the Yukon region? It’s a club both Kris and Kym are sure they’ll never join, even though over 100,000 people HAVE joined it and still others are dying to donate to the cause. There is adventure and thievery involved, and even the United States Postal Service plays a role in this story. Mostly it’s just gross because Kris and Kym are absolutely positive the garnish of the ritual drink will never touch THEIR lips. It’s a story that’s sure to make your toes curl and your innards roil. Unless you think it’s cool, if so we’d like to say you’re kinda weird, and good luck on your trip to the Great White North. For more information on the latest update to this story, check this link. And even though Kris swore we wouldn’t sully this blog with photos of the initiation ingredients, well, see below. To our faint-of-heart, we’ll post a cute picture of a scaredy cat that you can look at if you decide you can’t view the, ah, “garnish.” All we can say is you don’t ever expect this crap with coffee. (Unless you like THIS coffee, which is literally from crap.)

Sourtoe Cocktail Preparation – Downtown Hotel, Dawson City. **Photo courtesy** Downtown Hotel, Dawson City, Yukon Territory by TravelingOtter

This is how we feel about the next photo. Hurry up, scroll down to get to the rest of the blog. SCROLL LIKE THE WIND! Photo by Francesco Ungaro on Pexels.com

*Sourtoe Cocktail Ingredients, and yes, that’s a mummified big toe.* **Photo courtesy** Downtown Hotel, Dawson City, Yukon Territory by TravelingOtter

Check out our “Toe News is Good News” episode on iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Overcast, Libsyn, Pocket Cast, Stitcher or anywhere you listen to podcasts. Then all you need to do is 1) subscribe 2) download and 3) listen! AND!!! 4) If you enjoy what you hear, please leave a rating and a review (pretty please?). The more subscribers and reviews we get, the more opportunities we get to grow this podcast and bring you richer content.

© The Mugly Truth 2019 and © The Mugly Truth Podcast 2019. All rights reserved.
Intro and outro music, “Clever as a Fox” by Espresso Music through premiumbeats.com.
Featured photo courtesy of Kimberly Sickel, @riverdeer on 500px

Episodes

Wii Be 50

November 13, 2018November 19, 2018 themuglytruth

Kym and Kris feel FINE! — There is a lot of stuff captured in today’s episode, but the real takeaway is Kym and Kris feel FINE AT FIFTY! Photo by Kimberly Sickel, @riverdeer 500px

Happy Tuesday! Hope everyone’s election day went…well. But enough about politics. Today Kym and Kris get into a series of discussions ranging everywhere from the latest California wildfires to teenagers strangling their mom’s (FLORIDA KNOCK YOUR SH*T OFF) to Kym’s shopping for sub-zero temperatures clothing, how Xboxes and Wiis can be completely heartless, cruel and insensitive, and then Kris recounts her harrowing trip to the ER in the middle of the night. (Ok. NOT harrowing, but eventful). Oh, and Kym is CLEAR OF CANCER! All her tests came back and she is a clean, clear, cancer-free slate. We could not be happier! There’s so much to be grateful for!

Rocky the Podcat hasn’t left Kris’ side since she got home from the hospital. She loves her hooman. Kris swears this is true.

And then there’s the discussion about our total obsession with bullet journaling (aka, bujo) and exactly how it is NOT just for women. In fact, it was started by a guy named Ryder Carroll, who explains it all in this video. So, if you need a little organization, focus, tracking, spaces for ideas, doodles, lists, or anything else you can think of to keep your life running a little more smoothly – and have it all in one place – we highly recommend trying this personalized planner system that you can keep as simple or as embellished as you want!

Kym's Bullet Journal — Here’s Kym’s bullet journal week at a glance done in a very creative, yummy way!

Kris' Bullet Journal — A really washed out Habit Tracker for Kris to track how many days in the month of November she cusses out people in traff**k. Considering today is the 13th, we’re thinking Kris has a lot to think about. Just sit there and think about what you’ve done Kris.

Check out the Wii BE 50 episode on iTunes/Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Overcast, Libsyn, Pocket Casts, Stitcher or anywhere you listen to podcasts. Then all you need to do is 1) subscribe 2) download and 3) listen! AND!!! 4) If you enjoy what you hear, please leave a rating and a review (pretty please?). The more subscribers and reviews we get, the more opportunities we get to grow this podcast and bring you richer content.

Tag: Florida

The Coronials Are Coming!

The Good, the Strange, and the Unusual